I am so sick of bitchiness towards pretty people. Sure, there are times when I gaze with envy at hotter gals; but I try my hardest not to be disdainful of them. Why should they be the object of my jealousy? They haven’t done anything to me. If I feel insecure, I should either change my appearance or get over it!
So when I saw this great article, “The Beauty Trap,” by Catharine Lumby, I realized I wasn’t alone.
Lumby’s article is a response to all the bitchy blogosphere hoopla that was directed at Samanatha Brick. Brick became a source of such wrath when she published an autobiographical article on how hard it is to be a good-looking blonde. She specifically points to the bitchiness of women who are jealous of her. Weellll…instead of getting sisterly support, she received tons of mean responses from women.
Lumby challenges all of this nasty commentary. She asks: “where’s the feminist language that lets us speak about these things (beauty) in a kind and honest manner? Why is it so hard to talk about female beauty without defaulting to patriarchical stereotypes that simultaneously praise feminine allure and denounce its bearer as shallow, vain and vapid?” She goes on to write:”…we do not need to jettison our appreciation of beauty to accept that women can be attractive, but also smart, determined, funny and generous…why do the two domains, mind and body, cancel each other?… (F)eminism has taught us that the mind and the body should not be seen as separate. Men claimed the life of the mind for so long — and the privileges of public life that went with it. Abortion, rape, domestic violence, shame for having sex outside of wedlock — they were written on the female body and left for women to shoulder in the domestic sphere…when we separate the mind and the body and see the former as more valuable, we forget where we came from. Bodies matter, pleasure matters, beauty matters.”
Amen sister! Not only does she knock down the ridiculous equation: beautiful people = vain and stupid people, she embraces our bodies and the pleasure they give us.
Here’s a thought: maybe if we all were MORE vain and inward focused, then we would stop looking at others and hating them so much!