Weekend Observations: The new “f” bomb

My daughter dropped the “f” bomb.  No, I don’t mean “fuck”, which unfortunately she may actually know given she’s the third child.  No, she said “fat.”

A little context: I was home after a week of traveling, eating a yummy (and a bit greasy) dinner with the whole fam, and enjoying every bit of it.  After chowing down the equivalent of two people’s portions, I said, “Ok, it’s probably a good idea to stop eating so much.”  She jumped in and said “yeah, mom, I don’t want you to get fat.”

Huh?!  My husband and I looked at each other in panic.  Where did she hear that word?  I treat fat/weight “talk” the same may I treat swear words: while I may engage in both, I try to keep it totally out of my vocabulary at home.

Moreover, where did she get a sense that being fat is bad, particularly for her mommy?  We proceeded to grill her with questions like, “where did you hear that word?”, “why don’t you want mommy to get fat?”, what’s wrong with being fat?”, “you know we never say that word, right?”, etc.

Given that she’s only 6, and probably tries to find any way to interject in our conversations, I sort of see this bomb as a way of getting attention.  Nevertheless, it surprised us.  While we don’t use the “fat” word, we are very conscious about what we eat, especially when we see the kids over indulging in junk food.  For us, eating the wrong foods lead to unhealthy, unhappy bodies.

But the way my daughter said the “f” word, it felt like an insult.

Did we send out some signals that allowed her to interpret being overweight as something bad?  I hope not, but I have to confess, I must have.  Could she have overheard my derisive comments about my own weight gain while kvetching to friends? Or has she seen me make faces at my self when I get a scary peek at my cellulite?

Who knows. I take my own 24 hour concern over my weight for granted.  It’s just something I think about on a daily basis along with what I should wear to work and eat for lunch.

But I’m going to have to kick this habit for good.  I periodically tell myself I have to shut up about my weight loss/gain.  But I need to really make an effort or I’m going to raise a mini me, yikes!

Any one with tricks how to get over my addiction?

Looks Discrimination is Bad For Business

When I read the article, “Dress Code Discrimination: Different Figure, Different Rules?” I couldn’t help but nod my head throughout the entire piece.  The story is about weight discrimination.  The author, Kristen Houghton, writes about her friend who adopts the uniform of the season, i.e., leggings and tunics, but was told that she dressed inappropriately because of her weight.  To be more specific, her manager told her that her outfit accentuated her curves too much.  She was outraged and went up the ladder to get her manager in deep shit.

While I haven’t suffered from that exact form of discrimination, I relate to the story.  In my past life, I could wear a simple shortish skirt and get a “talking to.”  And believe me, I’m no Kim Kardashian or Victoria’s Secret model, but I still got my share of comments from the boss.  Unlike the heroine of this article, I would usually go home after such incidents, cry and then go buy more modest, frumpy clothes.

I’m not trying to get the world to wear hooker outfits to work, but I think we need to be more open-minded to all body types and let people express themselves.

Plus, if we let people express themselves in the ways that are most natural for them, they’ll be happier and more creative as a result.  This translates to more productivity and a better bottom line (no pun intended!)

So, you bosses out there, just let people be who they are and wear what they want.  Everyone will benefit in the end.

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